hi everybody it's Darlene again and I am here to do more of a focus chat video and I feel this kind of time to kind of talk about this stuff because I've also been inspired by another YouTube channel and I feel it's kind of important because when I started my youtube channel I was definitely more focused on weight loss and sharing what I eat videos and then then I've got I got more to where I wanted my channel to be and it's no secret you know I've struggled with my weight pretty much since I hit puberty as a teenager you know I gained weight from medications I gained weight from emotional eating not being active like how does anybody gain weight right and it's something I've always always struggled with and I was always able to stay pretty active and be able to do a lot of different things but you know as you get older and stuff things do get a little bit more difficult and also realizing that you know this fad diet isn't gonna work trying to eat this all the time and restricting yourself from so many things just ends up turning into a binge and you know oh I missed all these foods and everything like thought and throwing so that my husband has heart disease and I have a special needs fun with food sensory issues with textures some foods he likes some he doesn't you know it's it's it's a lot and sometimes I feel like I'm so hard on myself and then sometimes I feel like I'm doing the best that I can and am I doing the best that I can could I make improvements and you know everybody's a critic trait and I think I love just getting comments from people that understand the struggles of different things and I think the thing is sometimes we go through experiences too and we feel like we can offer advice and that and believe me I see it all the time I watched grocery haul videos I've watched food prep videos and I have opinions and whether I agree with what they're doing or what they're not doing maybe I could offer a comment but I never do because I know what it feels like and like I said I don't know what goes on with the rest of their life I don't know about their doctor's appointments how they feel when they're not filming and stuff like that and I think that's a really big thing to remember so with Andrew Phyllis is very important to put out there because everybody has opinions and obviously back in the Jenny McCarthy days of autism the whole gluten-free thing was you know it's interesting and I'm not gonna give opinions and stuff you know you can do your research you can try it yourself everybody has opinions even with supplements and stuff I don't like to give opinions or share with what I'm taking because I really feel like it's between you and your doctor and you know taking advice from just people on the street or you know people that it works for them like you know I don't know your history I don't know your blood work I don't know you know how your body feels and I just feel like it's dangerous to give opinions and advice and I think the biggest thing with Andrew is when Andrew was eating a very unbalanced diet no fruits no vegetables a very high carbohydrates not a lot of protein he got sick a lot and I mean like sick for seven to ten days he would get a virus because there was he had no immune system you know he didn't have any like he took a vitamin and orange juice and other than that he pretty much a crunchy cereal and bread like you know I don't know it's just it's what he ate we did that for years and years so when he would get a virus he would get so sick and he would throw up and honestly I was always scared that he was gonna die because he would get so weak and honestly he would go limp from throwing up because it took so much energy out and he couldn't keep anything down he would lose all of this weight and then it would take a time to get back and this was like multiple times throughout the winter and we haven't had that since he started eating a more balanced diet is it a perfect diet no could he eat better could he ate worse and you know everybody has their opinions but the other thing is too that I don't like to talk about this but I do feel it's important just from the special needs thing is bowels we ran into a lot of lot of difficulties with having no fiber you know no adequate nutrition in his diet and now it's it not even an issue which you have no idea how an amazing thing that is to not worry about your child getting so sick and to also have bathroom issues and just all of the things his anxiety his patience I truly believe and the doctors believe that too that it's just all kind of balanced out for Andrew and he's doing amazing he's very active I haven't started taking him to my gym yet because I want it you know he does so much with school he has gym every day he is just the treadmill he uses the bikes he uses the weights he uses the Roma Sheen's his gym teacher is just so impressed with how far he has come so there is goals in place once he is done school and he doesn't have the gym anymore with school then we're going to incorporate all that but obviously that stuff that we're working on privately as a family now for my husband he does have heart disease we're having an appointment with the dietician because I feel like when everything happened it was very overwhelming and you were trying to take in all of this information so we're kind of going down that path again all of his blood work all of the appointments with the cardiologists and everything they're very happy with the way that everything's going and I think the big thing is medication is doing you know a lot of help and being active and all that kind of stuff so that's my husband I don't want to get into that because there's so many different opinions and at the end of the day we are in close contact with the professionals the doctors and everything that follow up on all of this so please know that we're not just not talking to anybody and doing our own things so now for me so obviously I have been very inspired and kind of a real look at Shelley's home life I think most of you guys in my in our 40s kind of our age range are very you know I really do like Shelley's home life because I do find she's very relatable and I know that there's other youtubers out that are very very healthy very active eat very well that you know they have more what do you call it you know food that wasn't necessarily an issue for them you know they're very strict with how they eat and doing all that and that's inspiring too but I know how hard that is so obviously Shelley she just shared her one-year update on keto I think it was very I think watching her videos also kind of intrigued some things with me because I did try keto before and I think the biggest thing with keto is that you think it's really easy because even on Instagram is terrible for keto I lost a hundred pounds and I didn't even exercise and we also have some local people in our community that have lost a lot of weight from Quito they never exercise no it's great that you can lose weight with an eating plan but if you're not gonna be active you can be just as unhealthy as a really thin person because I think we all know how important it is to have at least 30 minutes of activity each day whether it be walking you know walking the mall doing some kind of physical exercise for 30 minutes it's very important and I think everybody needs to fit that in their life whether it be a short walk you know walking up and down the stairs not throughout the day I mean 30 minutes consistent exercise and I think it's really important and I think people don't understand the impact of the activity the impact it has on your cardiovascular system because you can lose weight and feel better but honestly if you're not gonna be active it's it's game-changing and I speak from experience so anyways I am obviously intrigued by the keto and you know there's the whole thing with blood work my doctor has given me the okay to do it but I don't necessarily want to follow keto keto and I just wanted to kind of put it out there with you guys because the last few weeks I've experimented with some different foods that kind of keep me satisfied at different times of the day and I've kind of been playing around with my breakfasts and lunches and snacks and I just want to let you guys kind of know a little bit because you might see some different things that I'm trying and I'll try not to drink as much pop try to have a little bit more fat content certain parts of the day and really kind of listening to my body because one I want to be active I want to go to the gym I want to be able to go hiking and stuff but I also know that the inflammation in my knees and my legs are getting really bad the Achilles thing that I am dealing with I know that losing weight will help that and it's I know what I need to do but I also know what I need not to do because you can say like it's a mind game and really kind of listening to your body seeing how you feel after you eat certain foods and when you don't eat certain foods I've been doing that a lot too so I just wanted to put that out there for you guys because there's the whole thing to with fatty livers blood work cholesterol what actually goes on inside your body because boy oh boy it's an amazing thing I am NOT here to tell you guys what to eat I'm gonna share with you guys what we eat but all I ask is that you know I know you have opinions I have opinions and I keep my opinions to myself when it comes to other YouTube channels and I would much rather an email message if you're completely completely concerned because I find with comments they're so short and hard to kind of really reel get a feedback from them so I think if you have like anybody that's messaged me I've gotten so many messages from people that have shared things that have worked for them things that have not worked for them things they wish they would have known and things they learned on their journey and those emails mean so much to me because you get to know a little bit more about the person you know yeah you tell me a little bit about your family or history some of the struggles that you have and honestly I get a lot more out of an email than I do by a an opinionated comment and that I'm not here to tell you guys what to do what not to do like I said at the end of the day we all have to make our own decisions from our family and at the end of the day if we are seeking the guidance from the professionals that's all we can do because I would never go buy anything what one person says because like I said I don't know them from I don't know the struggles but I felt it was really important to kind of talk about some of the struggles that we had with Angie and when you have your child collapsing into your arms not knowing if they're gonna make it through the night from dehydration and just throwing up how hard it is on actual little bodies it's very very scary and also when you are going weeks at a time without proper bowel function it's very scary stuff because you can you can have some serious damage from that so thankfully we've been able to get everything under control my husband is being monitored he's having his yearly annual checkups and everything so we'll go from there so I understand your concerns but with me I do we all have regular doctor's appointments we have other things that help us and bloodwork is very very important and it is a very big part of our life so that's my suggestion to you guys whatever you're struggling with or not you know talk to your professional but I don't want to focus on what I'm doing for weight loss and stuff like that because I know that I've gained some weight the last few months because there's been a lot of celebrations Mother's Day Father's Day Canada Day end of school lots of treats and I haven't been going to the gym I like to do weights I like to do walking and I like trying to tone different things up and seeing different changes and I think the last couple of months I've just kind of given myself a little bit of excuses or being you know you're really really busy well everything is slowing down now and I just think this weekend is my time to kind of really focus on my breakfast lunch dinner is what I'm gonna bring into the home what my family needs to to eat kind of finding a perfect balance and the way that our family is because of everybody's needs I might have to cook three different meals at night some nights my husband and I might eat different meals some nights we'll eat the same meal for everybody but I just wanted to kind of put it out there for you guys because I felt like it was really important to do a kind of talk about everything in every one kind of video and you know I choose to share my family I'd sure I share to choose our eating and stuff and I get that everybody has opinions but at the end of the day – I'm not a channel here to tell you guys what to eat I'm a channel here to give you guys different ideas to show you guys what I do to kind of fit all of everything in in my life and I think it's really important to kind of put that baser because I know Shelley talked about that and her your update about talking to your doctor first and all of that and I think that's the biggest thing so I really really really admire her from that and I feel it's very important to give credit where credit is due because I think she's I've really been inspired by her so some of her recipes I've shared and some I want to try and some I have no interest in trying and I think that is amazing so I just wanted to kind of do this video because I felt it was really important to kind of have also a very linkable video – – sure kind of you know if you're new to my channel here's a video about why why we eat the certain way and at the end of the day I don't want to focus on the scale anymore I don't want to focus on weight loss I want to focus on feeling better having lots of energy monitoring my blood work seeing the scale go down at a steady pace not flipping back up again but getting to the gym having my legs feel better because there's not as much weight on them that my joints are feeling better and I think we're at that point in our lives where you got to start growing up and also realizing that you can't turn to food for comfort and also kind of working on that emotional part and I know I've shared a lot of that on my channel so as I said before if you want to reach out to me through an email even through Instagram but I like email because I can sit at my keyboard and actually type I found that's the best way to get ahold of me if you're really concerned or want to share your story with me but as I've said before what has worked for you to lose weight does not mean it's gonna work for me what supplement that has helped for you doesn't necessarily mean it's gonna work for me because all of our bodies are very different so I thank you all so much for your love and support 25,000 subscribers all through hard work and just being as real and honest with you guys as possible I thank you so much for your support your views your kind comments your likes your everything it means so much to me so I'm gonna get back on with my Saturday and really enjoy my date but I just felt this video was so important to do so take care everyone


  1. Oh boy! Once you tell people what you're doing, you open yourself up to all kinds of criticism! I wish you good health and happiness in whatever way you choose to pursue that goal!! But, I do agree with exercise being an important part of getting and staying healthy!

  2. My husband lost 30+ lb since February because he is a very determined and focused person. He started to run and bike and weigh his portions. As for the diet – very low carb and a lot of vegetables and good amount of meat. He also cut down on beer. It is not even a diet – it is a proper way to eat always.I find a lot more vegetable recipes now. One of the big things is to train yourself to like vegetables and put a lot of focus on eating them as a main course.

  3. You’re doing great! You’re consistently providing love and nourishing meals to your family. No matter your diet, someone else will find room to criticize. You shouldn’t feel any shame for the foods you enjoy and what you eat. 💕

  4. You are an awesome mom and woman! Please remember no one sits in the hereafter and says I wish I was thin.
    I know how hard it is to help your son. You are doing fantastic!
    I have a brother with downs and I went to school for human services. I have worked with special needs people. All ages and problems. They are my peeps ♡♡♡
    We don't own a scale anymore.

  5. I am a heart disease person, had open heart surgery at 48 years old. I love love your videos and whatsmore I love you and the way you take care of your family. You do it with love and care and with common sense. Life has a way of getting in the way of our best of intentions but I do my best and I do it with my familys best interests at heart. I am a mam of 4 and listen dear lady, you are doing a wonderful job. Smile and be proud, you are amazing. xx

  6. I swear you are the only youtuber I have never gotten tired of. I cant stand seeing the change in so many of these people who throw out the concept of “being real” its irritating bc they aren’t its so weird, you are a breath of fresh air!!!! Ive been watching you for yrs now I began bc both our sons are on the spectrum my son is a lot different but we still have challenges and you helped me feel not so alone at the beginning of my journey. Plus you still comment back I appreciate you. Much love from NC oxoxoxo!!!

  7. Shelly is such an inspiration to me, too! My husband and I have been doing keto for 6 months now, and aside from losing weight, even BETTER, is how our blood work has improved! We both have type 2 diabetes, which was steadily getting worse…but now our "numbers" (A1c) have gone down and our meds decreased! I also have a friend on keto, too, and the first nonscale benefit she noticed was less inflammation! I share that with you Darlene, because you mentioned it being an issue with you. If you do decide to try this way of eating, I wish you all the best! What we love about it the most, I think, is the flexibility and simplicity. You don't have to be hard core…you can do "lazy keto"; or just whatever works best for you. Along with your plans to exercise, I'm sure you'll do great!

  8. Weight loss is a personal journey. Everyone needs to figure out what works for them. It is very important to seek advice from a medical professional. I’m happy to hear Andrew is doing much better since his diet has improved over time. 😊👍🏻

  9. So well said. People offer me advice for my chronic health issues and I ask what med school that they got their diploma from.

    I offer advice very carefully and normally I add in to talk with their doctor about it. I can say I take X for this, but I don't know what meds they are on not their health issues. I'm not a medical professional.

    I love your channel and videos. I use your food videos for ideas or inspiration. Everybody is different and have different tastes and dietary needs.

  10. My uncle was a professional trainer and I’ve always had weight issues and still do, but my uncle always said cleaning your house is the best exercise, I love to dance even just having a dance party in my house with my nephew is always fun as well and great exercise. I also have a puppy so she keeps me busy as we live in a carriage style condo and we live on the top so no yard and we have to walk her.

  11. I love your videos. You are genuine and that's what I love about you! I want to encourage you to keep being real. Your love and commitment to your family is so important and I think you're making a lot of good decisions! Keep it up!

  12. Well, I had my say last week…. 😉
    I've been half-a**ing keto, and I find that my biggest stumbling block is that I just LIKE BREAD. I can get by with erythritol sweetener, it costs more, but it's no big deal: but you can't make bread from almonds or coconuts. You just can't. I'm still trying, and I'm not hating myself for backsliding…. I can eat bunless burgers. I can eat "pie" without crust. But I like bread for the sake of bread.
    That said, I'm immensely healthier and I feel a LOT better eating this way, so I'm not giving up on it.
    But, you're right. I might give my opinion, but I don't have a say in the way you do your life, and I don't expect you to listen to me just because I'm talking. Just know that if I throw something out there, it's an observation, not a judgment.
    You do what works for you.

  13. Amen, you need to do what's right for your family not anyone else's. Just because one thing work for one doesn't mean it will work for another. I agree eating good is important, but so is moving and getting that heart rate up. I to lift and walk and it makes me feel so much better. My eating was bad this past year, I was working out. Just 2 weeks ago my husband and I decided together to make some changes (his cholesterol is high), by just cutting way back on sugar (junk food) he has lost in 2 weeks 8 lbs (MEN) and I go up and down only by a 1 or 2lbs (tis a woman). But I have lost some inches and I feel so much better. The weight loss will come. It was a struggle at first, but we treat ourselves once a week to a donut or a small piece of cake and to be honest my belly doesn't feel good after. We didn't cut sugar out of our diets, just changed what we eat more fruits, veggies, portion control with snacks, not junk food snacks better options and so on. Now it works for us, but I can't preach to others to do the same because it may not work for them. I think you guys are doing great with your eating. Adding lost of veggies and fruits is huge and you are doing so. Just keep plugging away that balance will find you just at the right time, but for now you are doing great. Just look back to what you ate a year ago to now HUGE IMPROVEMENTS! Look at it this way the working out is all set now the eating will fall into place one thing at a time..

  14. Thank you for the heartfelt talk today Darlene. It never ceases to amaze me the number of experts out there who never attended medical school! Each person has their own history and situations that they are dealing with. That is why we all must seek professional support when we want to make a change in our lives. What works for one is just that. FOR ONE!

  15. Thankyou for sharing your life with us all. I truly look forward to you videos. I am inspired by you all the time, I love that you are just so real… sending love and hugs xx

  16. NOT every child with Autism has gluten problems! SOME yes. I gave my son fish oil because everyone else said it would get him to talk… Gave him the runs..

  17. Clean eating is best for me. You are doing great eating healthy. We all have to find what will work for the rest of our lives. Exercise is great. You love the gym, so you can do it! I love how you feed Andrew. Good job, Darlene! He is so happy. I love your care for your family.

  18. Keto worked for me until it didn't lol never having sweets wouldn't be sustainable forever. The ONLY thing that's worked is 16:8 Intermittent Fasting. Besides losing 40 pounds pretty much effortlessly, it has finally cleared my premenopausal brain fog! When you find the thing that works for you it is game changing, good luck!

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