The Jacqueline Hayes Show featuring Beverly Fells Jones, “The Silver Fox of Consciousness” (part 2 o

The Jacqueline Hayes Show featuring Beverly Fells Jones, “The Silver Fox of Consciousness” (part 2 o



if you don't believe in that go if you don't believe that goal is ever attainable and nurture that on the inside it will never be a table right and understand that the saboteur lives within absolute right because one of the things I find out is when I talk to people and they'll start talking and I'll go you want to change the way you said that and they look at me like what cuz they just said it in a negative and what they weren't even aware of it Ryan yeah weren't even aware no change that to this right so that's one of the things I wound up doing just have a conversation right now right yeah right now this will make a change in your life so true just changing it from an example of somebody just having a conversation it's like I want to do more yeah like I want a new car but I can't afford it or I just simple stuff like my boyfriend won't go to this restaurant with me or my mother will do XYZ uh-huh the negative side yeah or a perfect example when your kids are running people who have children or you got somebody and you got a door what's the first thing we tell folks did it don't slam the door okay and what did they do they usually slam the door that's right so what do you want what do you want them to close the door gently close the door gently and go out okay yeah don't forget or you know just ease the door close I think people and I and this is and I think it's not going to uncle and practically have to be mindful that your words are reflection of your thoughts and if you want to know what's what's going on inside your head pay attention to the words that come out of your mouth right and if you want to change your mouth change your thoughts when you look around your life or just look around right and take inventory of your life and and as I said as I started learning this I went back in my life to see same here what happened what did I do another example of my thinking and I think this going back in the high school I was in choir first friend and they we did Broadway shows each year and we did Annie Get Your Gun and we did South Pacific okay and so it there was a call for auditions now in the school that I went to the black population was like 2% okay right and I just decided that okay he'll never pick me right in my mind it's like well what am I going to miss what am I going to sing now I'm not gonna go and you know I've analyzed this a number of time but in my mind it was I'm not gonna be picked why should I bother but you wanted it I wanted it yeah I want it to do that yeah and I didn't go you didn't even have anything you taught yourself on if I talked myself out of it the next day after auditions mr. caruso that have live is now mr. charisma says to me why weren't you at auditions last night and I just looked at him he said I had apart for you but I can't give it to you because you weren't at all did he didn't show up I didn't check less enlarged right the lesson learned victim right because that was my thinking because I didn't think he'd pick a girl like me now in South Pacific there's a specific role for a girl like me oh there was a native girl who was elite was the lead in the show and I wound up being in chorus and and and then the dance troupe I enjoyed that too yeah so but that was a lesson learned and there's lots of those in my life that I can go back and see what my thinking was and that did but that was my belief system that he wouldn't pick me yeah so I think we've really set the the foundation to kind of talk about our topic now and just so we've got some rich here just kind of stacked the things all we going to talk about in terms of your belief systems are they serving you well or not so let's walk through a few questions and let's define from your perspective what belief systems are to give our listeners some context in terms of what that means well your billing systems are formed from right because even there we hear our mothers talking we feel the emotions but we we do here I mean they're now saying you know play play classical good on the stomach and and all that kind of stuff and hold your stomach a certain way the child is affected in the uterus when you come out you are bombarded by voices and people talking in conversation and as a young child you absorb everything right so talking a little bit about brain waves a young child is always they sleep a lot because their brain waves they're super slow there's a delta okay as they get older and they're staying awake a little longer their brain waves get a look the predominant brain rates a little faster and that's theta that's where you learn in favor daddy yes and that's why kids learn so fast they can learn two and three languages at the same time they can do all kind of things so they're learning from their parents from their grandparents from the people that are out there they in daycare are they listening to the people in daycare so they're they're learning and you know they hear their parent that's talking about somebody who never does anything or they tell their parents talk about money doesn't grow on trees and you know we're having a struggle and this they're learning all of that absorbing on so you're observing and learning and gaining your beliefs simply by being by being with your family right and so on now somewhere along the line as you get older you have the opportunity to believe it or not to believe it you have the opportunity to grow as you're in school okay miss apparently you don't have a question for you because you know most of us live life on autopilot where we're not even aware of our belief systems period I know but you're making those choices all of them all right you're not and I'm talking for my own expense you know I was picking up these beliefs and things or I'd reject him based on something I've learned so we're always in learning mode always we are absorbing these thoughts and think so that's why I tell people turn off television mm-hmm turn off the reality shows on who you love them but turn off these shows because they're not real they're all scripted right and and so you have to understand that so so you've got to take the time to start thinking about what you think about correct I like that take the time to start thinking about what you're thinking about being conscious of your thoughts what you're thinking about and yeah so let's say you want something okay you want that promotion at work or you want a new job what are your first thoughts I'll never get that promotion Oh John is better for that promotion than me oh they'll never promote me to that job or is it I deserve that job I know I've got the skills for that job I've got this and do you ask yourself what is it that I need to do to make that job my to manifest what I want yeah man that is so true my background to human resources and staffing I've hired and counseled and talked to so many super skilled professionals they would come to my office for advice in terms of wanting to look at and it's an opportunity for advancement and they want to get my feedback in terms of the resume the position we look at the basic requirements talk about their skills and on paper and even from what I knew in terms of experience they were super confident competently they could go in and just ace the interview and get the job but doing our talks like whoa I don't know if I'm qualified here and I don't often qualify here right they want the job and literally there's that there was this pool like I want this opportunity to grow in advance however I'm afraid I don't know if I'm worried the I guess innocence and I'm second and we've stacked the job we've looked at their resume their credentials and the job requirements they exceed the requirements but the mental talk the dialogue in terms that's they come for me feels like well here's what the job entails here's what she brings the table plus this and then we have the conversation on how to go ahead and take the step and apply for the job and please put your name in the Hat right yeah but just even that whole idea of an internal combination internal conversation you have yourself you talk yourself out of things before you even take write and I know some of you go home yeah I'll go after that job but there's something else in your life that you'll turn around and talk to yourself yeah you know I you know is there a possibility I was talking to a young man and he was talking about there was this college he wanted to go to mm-hmm in North Carolina I think it was Duke and he said but I'll never could engage in that's why I went to Collin County I said well what makes you well my SAT goes for may see D scores wasn't that I saw what he said but I didn't have this I said so what he said what do you mean I said did you go to the college he said no it wasn't worth it I said did you go to the college and he looked at me because of you going on campus and what did you want to major in he said I said you could have gone on campus found that department found the department head had an interview talked to him about what can I do to make it possible for me to come here maybe I can't come in and some freshman but can I it's their way I can get here as a junior is there what is it that I need to do what do I need to talk to you about and said because there's been people I don't know of who have gone to the college to the department head and got in yeah because they wanted it bad enough the desire very very and they were maybe on the Kospi with the normal okay the committee is looking at this well what if the committee is there but the person you talk to is on the committee he met you or she left what a committee chair that oh yeah yeah and and all of a sudden they go no we're gonna take John because now I know John he'll be good yeah and he won't flunk out in this circle yeah this is so sometimes you have to take things into your own hands or be mindful if you think you live don't pass yeah and don't walk away but as I said ask the question what do I need to do to get XY and Z again your belief system has to be there to allow you to ask that question cuz now you're saying there's a possibility right I don't or that there's the other folks they came to you to find out what they needed to do even though they felt maybe unworthy or they might not get the God job they were afraid lutton's we're just afraid and and because our society has trained us to be super humble right sometimes that you made out if you mail these stops us from moving forward yeah right because we look at somebody and say boys just like it's a it's of almost it's almost a false sense of humility like it's it's playing small for the wrong like it's playing smallest for no reason but underneath that a belief system has them playing for small it's not a false humidity humility it's ingrained in them and they haven't been taught how to move forward example yeah again me IBM people were getting branch manager and warrants and I said I did okay a brace Rose your award and I saved the home and count yeah pocket and they're not talk to one of the guys he said did you go in and tell your manager oh well huh I saw what he saw what I did he does what I didn't know and talk to your manager right and toot your own horn yeah we weren't taught that Cersei's females you didn't teach your own no way you wouldn't dare brag about you that's one thing I talk to you when they do a performance and that's your best time to thanks by yourself toot your horn loudly and proudly let them know so you're comfortable asking for the highest percentage of the we're all in that we can relate to you not even been aware yeah there's a lot of things we don't we aren't aware of because we haven't been open to it yeah so with that I still wound up not going in the office because I hadn't done anything recently or I had thought I had been anything next meeting I got a branch manager award and I went to my friend I said you went in and talked to the manager didn't you he said yes I did so somebody else went out and spoke for me but it was also a lesson to start making sure my manager knew what I had accomplished or what I had its be comfortable comfortable communicating that not assuming for me it was just my job yeah right but for them they're busy they have so many things think about it right so okay so that leaves us right into our next question returns in terms of um your belief systems are they serving you well or not is how can someone begin to identify the belief systems in terms of just trying to get a handle on or just to kind of turn the corner to start making that in their awareness space well one of the things I suggest is find your friend who you believe is positive okay alright that friend is always looking at things on the bright side okay and enlist their aid in saying whenever I say something negative let me know whenever I say this can't happen you know you can use a keyword you can you know like some people have a safe word I want you to say the key word is you know or just say negative right and and that because they'll hear you speaking that way but you don't because it's a normal yeah so you can enlist the aid of a friend

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